Earlier than Jake Gyllenhaal body-shamed us along with his unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt and Doug Liman declared a David and Goliath battle in opposition to Amazon over the streaming reboot of an ‘80s traditional there was 2006′s “Road House 2: Last Call.”

The little-seen sequel follows up on 1989’s “Road House” the place Patrick Swayze rips a person’s throat out, Sam Elliott faculties us on facial hair and Kelly Lynch redefines knockout.

We’re not right here to speak about that flat-out masterpiece however the sequel few followers truly noticed.

“Road House 2: Last Call” follows DEA agent Shane Tanner (Jonathon Schaech) as he’s known as residence to Louisiana after backwoods drug sellers (led by Jake Busey) strive shifting in on a rowdy bar owned by his uncle, Nate Tanner (Will Patton).

There’s a lazy subplot about Shane having a light obsession with discovering the one who killed his father, Dalton (Swayze). Sure, they kill Dalton offscreen.

The much less stated about this miscalculation, the higher.

The issues of “Road House 2” (in addition to its questionable existence) are frequent threads amongst many DTV motion pictures of its period. DTV means “Direct to Video,” which is now an acronym that exhibits off your age.

Earlier than streaming took over our lives, corporations like Sony Footage Dwelling Leisure (behind “Road House 2”) would use budgets made up of pocket change, bubble gum and an honest examine for a yesteryear star to churn out video sweet for rental retailer cabinets.

FAST FACT: Director Kevin Smith and producer Scott Mosier recorded a commentary observe for a 2006 DVD launch of “Road House” (across the identical time “Road House 2” was launched). Based on Smith, he and Mosier spoke about loving “Road House” throughout their “Clerks” commentary observe and the following factor he knew, they had been requested to be a part of a brand new “Road House” launch.

These flicks both relied on stars professionally down on their luck (suppose Wesley Snipes, Steven Seagal) or recognizable titles to throw collectively a poster. They’d usually flip a revenue earlier than ending up in a Walmart low cost bin (Did I simply date myself once more? Are these nonetheless a factor?).

For example, do you know there’s a “Cruel Intentions 2” and “Cruel Intentions 3?” There’s additionally a “Boogeyman 2” and “Boogeyman 3.” In case you don’t bear in mind the unique “Boogeyman,” it’s okay. These flicks don’t usually construct on one another.

That is the place “Road House 2” at the least deserves some credit score.

It acknowledges the primary movie and contains loads of callbacks from the unique film (like “Pain don’t hurt” and Dalton’s bouncer guidelines). It additionally makes the unique “Road House” seem like it commanded a price range of about $200 million.

It’s not all dangerous with “Road House 2.” Schaech is a dedicated lead (he co-wrote the film), Patton ranges up something he’s in and Busey is an angsty, drug-dealing antagonist who’s enjoyable to look at in a going-for-Nicolas-Cage-broke form of manner.

What the flick is lacking are moments.

“Road House” comprises ridiculous or ridiculously dedicated moments that preserve the movie contemporary in followers’ minds. “Road House 2,” unsurprisingly, doesn’t have any of those stand-out scenes. It’s a padded-out film that’s barreling in direction of its finish.

It additionally barely earns its R-rating, which is sort of felony for a “Road House” sequel.

One component frequent to motion motion pictures at this time that followers are spared in “Road House 2?” The death-by-a-million cuts modifying that requires 4 dozen pictures to look at a person hop a fence and at all times guarantees to chop away simply when the digital camera may decide up one thing attention-grabbing.

The “Road House 2” stunt coordinator was J.J. Perry, who has labored on significantly better motion movies, together with “The Rundown.” The fights right here really feel paying homage to that early Dwayne Johnson image, albeit on a reduction.

“Road House 2” doesn’t rewrite the foundations on bare-knuckle brawling, nevertheless it does let its actors and stunt folks throw round some old-school punches (full with that ‘80s sound effect that makes every punch sound like a slap heard ’around the world). It’s not excessive leisure, however hey, it’s one thing, particularly after we’re speaking “Road House 2.”

Based on Schaech, the unique intention was for “Road House 2: Last Call” to be a remake. The eventual sequel was a part of a weird run in his profession the place he starred in a number of DTV sequels that had nothing to do with their supposed predecessors.

“I did a film with [Camilla Bella] 20-plus years ago and she was a kid in it. It was called ‘Lily,’ but they re-titled it ‘Poison Ivy 2.’ When I made ‘Road House,’ it was supposed to be a remake, but they made it a sequel. ‘8MM 2’ had nothing to do with the original film. It was renamed that so they can sell it,” Schaech informed Movie Worldwide in 2018.

“Road House 2: Last Call” looks like a pilot that might have been thrown collectively within the early ‘90s meant solely for syndication to capitalize on the success of “Road House” with out Swayze.

Forward of the unceremonial video launch of “Road House 2: Last Call,” co-screenwriter Miles Chapman tried to defend the absence of Swayze within the story.

“I know there has been some negative reaction to the news that Patrick Swayze won’t be appearing in the film. Well, all I have to say is that Will Patton and Jonathan Schaech are carrying the torch proudly,” the “Escape Plan” screenwriter informed The Hollywood Information in 2006, per Moviehole.

In 2022, Chapman’s tune was barely totally different.

The screenwriter informed the “Indie Film Hustle” podcast that “Road House 2” suffered from a low price range and a brutal 17-day shoot. He additionally revealed that the unique plan was to at all times have Swayze’s Dalton within the story, performing as “an Obi-Wan Kenobi in the bouncer world kind of thing.”

“If I was a little more savvy back then, I would’ve known that there was no way he was going to do this thing,” Chapman stated.

Zachary Leeman is a reporter who has been printed on web sites equivalent to Breitbart, LifeZette, and Mediaite. His novel “Nigh” can be launched later this 12 months from writer Gilded Masque.